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SPOOF
Apple excelled through year of Mideast turmoil, high oil prices, and a market that spent most of the year on a roller coaster. What's in store at Apple for 2005? Hopefully we will all find out in a week at MacWorld San Francisco. There has been much speculation about new hardware and software. Rumors have been flying over the internet for several weeks about flash based iPods, an iPod video, iWorks, and even a sub $500 iMac. Keeping up with the latest rumors is a tough job, but I found one that has to be heard, the $99 iMac.
This new iMac is targeted for the PC users who are “too cheap to kick in over a thousand dollars for an easy-to-use Macintosh computer.”
“The new iMac is a slick little beauty that will retail for $99. It has the very latest G6 processor chip running at 3 Ghz., Super Drive, 1024MB RAM, USB 3.0, Firewire, 10/100 BASE-T Ethernet, 75K V95 modem, and support for AirPort. The unit comes with the new Apple Professional Keyboard with 186 keys and with a remarkable new style mouse with SIX buttons, scroll wheel, and mind reader.”
“The new iMac will not only run all the latest Macintosh software, but it will also run all Windows, Linux, Commodore 64, Radio Shack TRS80, Atari, Gameboy and XBox software as well! Although the new computer will not include a monitor in the $99 package, it is rumored that Apple will throw in a 23-inch Cinema CD LCD Display for the first 10 million purchasers of the new model iMac. Not a bad deal”
And the quote of the year, Apple Computer CEO Steve Jobs said, “I predict this is going to be a very hot item for Apple! I've been wanting to stick it to Bill Gates ever since the old Apple //e days. This package is definitely going to make those boys in Redmond get their shorts in a knot! If this doesn't get Apple more than 3% of market share, I'll eat my Lisa!”
Thanks to The Spoof for posting this hilarious article.